Saturday, 24 January 2009

Fake your smile girls

My entire life i have had terrible luck.


boys are no exception to this rule. 


once upon a time there was this boy, (he can be named joe) who i couldn't stop thinking about. it was one of those things where  i didn't know what it was about him that i liked so much...i just did. we barely knew each other and met through friends. one night i was sleeping at my best friends house and she told me that she really really liked this kid, and of course it turns out to be the same person.  so i decided i would try to move on, bet he made it so hard for me. he was always there, in my circle at my lunch table, outside my class. over time it became it seemed apperant that nothing would happen between my friend and joe, but she still liked him and i didn't want to do that to her. but his hugs with me were just a little tighter and closer than other peoples. finally there was another guy (lets call him...kyle)  who liked me and i kind of liked him (but beleive me it kind of paled in comparison) so he asked me out and i decided it would be in everyone's best interest for me to try this relationship. so i agreed and LITERALLY an hour later the one i really liked confessed that he really liked me, and i was crushed. i couldn't break up with my new boyfriend for joe now, i didn't want to be the kind of girl who used people. so i explained this to joe and let time take it's course.  time passed and me and kyle didn't last long we were just too different. but now i still can't get "joe" out of my head.


he barely even talks to me now though. ever since that time nothing is the same...i have not only lost someone i thought i might love but i have lost a friend. when i see him i suck it up, fake my smile and say hi, but i dont think i'll ever stop liking him.


maybe i'm young and naive without much experience, but i can only judge how i feel now. 

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